Even Bad Experiences are Useful

When we find ourselves in despair over a current situation many people suggest that we should ask the question “what is the lesson here”? I do not find this useful at all. When I am in the middle of a seriously difficult situation, I do not have the clarity to get any response from that question. What I do get is more disturbed. More emotional. More confused. I am certain this is where the expression ‘Hindsight is 20/20’ comes from.

In the midst of a crisis, I can only step fully into it, feel it. Writing about the situation and how it is currently making me feel I find is very useful. It takes what is in our heads and in our hearts and puts it out there on a piece of paper that we can see and revisit as we need. As the days roll by and we write more about our feelings and however things may be evolving, including our emotional state, we can begin to see progress.

Progress is the most important word here. We must see the progress we are making so that despair can turn into sadness, and then into hope, and then actual change in the situation. We breathe a sigh of relief looking back at what we have written realizing that we are not as derailed as we were a few days or weeks ago. We can actually see that things are changing, that we are changing, and this begins to unveil the answer to the question “what lesson is this teaching me”?

Hindsight is indeed 20/20. We begin to realize the good in the bad. Perhaps, we are emotionally stronger now. Perhaps we have more clarity about the situation. Perhaps it forced us to make better decisions or to make the changes that we so desperately needed to make. And herein lies the gift.

Now we can proceed with more confidence, more clarity and regain our emotional foothold. We can state with conviction that this won’t happen to us again. We can pat ourselves on the back and move back into the flow of life, allowing good things to unfold. We are stronger, wiser, better than before. And probably we have more zest for life than ever before!